Cortisol… Cortisol flooding through my body keeping me high—strung. I just want to run as far as my lungs will take me, but pain strikes my heart and I’m on the ground again. Gasping. Breathing. So I’m lying there, lying. Thinking about the things I’m missing and searching for the light leading me through nowhere but… Too much cortisol. In a fast-paced life, with a fast-paced heart and fast-paced levels of cortisol forever increasing, I’m breathing roughly.
Wishing for peace of mind and soul as I’m breathing in under the water. Raindrops and droplets are all falling onto the dry ground that I inundate with cortisol. Breathe. In…hale… Exhale. Running again through the rain and flowers and leaves scattered across the ground. Now I’m lost in the field of tall grasses and wildflowers.
Forever asleep on the cold hard floor, to never wake again. Lying there because I was lying.